This month, instead of our usual, [gag-league info-event info-gag] formula—we’re going to mix it up and write a love letter.
This love letter isn’t for our wives, congressmen or your mom. It’s for Beehive Sport and Social Club captains.
Beehive captains are a rare breed of human. Simultaneously, capable of being prom king/queen and class clown these fine folks resist the temptation to binge watch Bob’s Burgers and instead, they register. They endure those 45 seconds of online pain because they know that in doing so they’ll blaze a trail for their friends to squeeze more enjoyment out of their weeknights.
Captains complain 73% less than your average Beehiver. They play with 142% more smile and reach their hand out to say “Hi, I’m ____” 1814% more. They’re the first people at the field and the last to leave. They are a LeBron James, Mia Hamm and Derek Jeter sushi burrito of leadership, with a side of fresh guac.
They are Millennials that vote. They are baby boomers that drive for Lyft. They are doers.
Oh, how we love you, Beehive captain. You remind Tommy to register for the 45th time (it will take 7 more attempts). You chastise Sally for not running through the safety base (politely). You let us know when Donny needs a Large instead of a Medium (CupBop isn’t low fat).
You do it all. All the texts, emails, calls it takes to create a magical Midsummer’s Night Dream of sand volleyball where cold drinks and wide grins provide the backdrop to life long friendships. That’s all you.
And for that, we love you.
Please please forward this email along to a captain in your life with an “amen emoji.”
If it’s a Beehive captain–that’s great. If it’s an old teacher, boss or parent–that’s fine too. We promise it’ll make their day.
Also, Fall flag football, dodgeball volleyball and futsal are open for registration, but if you’re a captain…you probably already knew that